GHOST OF CHRISTMAS PRESENT

Christmas is actually aver special day in everywhere. In Kenya it is unique in its own way and do not let anyone convince you that he ghost of Christmas present is a thing we see in movies because it is real and can be seen and felt in Kenya.

This is the time when boutique owners will need to replenish their stocks with all sizes of trending clothes because a family of five kids will walk into the store looking for three similar t-shirts of sizes 3, 12 and 32 for the three brothers and two similar hipster or white dress of sizes 8 and 28 to complete the sisters. And that applies to the shoes and the rasta on their heads. On this day sisters look like a story of their mother growing up, as in they look so alike except for their sizes.

There are troops moving from every part of the country to town. Mostly these are relatives who have just completed CPE and KCSE from pat opuk mixed day and boarding primary and secondary school and they need to at least be in tao for “initiation” by the born tao cousins. Tailors are not spared either, they will be working day and night to complete an order of all types of clothes ranging from kitenge suits so scarves all with the same deadline, the evening of 24^th December.

The market is a no go zone if you hate crowds, chicken and goat vendors are actually making a kill. Prices of tomatoes capsicum, garlic, ginger coriander and onions are double. Lettuce, broccoli and cauliflowers are spared because they are not too common in Kenyan meals. Supermarkets are almost running out of wheat flour and oil and sugar. It is a rather rough time for maize retailers. Nobody even greets them, wait they are not even in their shops they are also possessed by the ghost of Christmas present.

Security is a very sensitive issue. It starts from pubs where drunkards fight over the date when bensouda got married. At homes, hanging clothes at night is totally out of question. There are zombies that hoover around carrying along anything affiliated to celebrations including empty beer bottles, shoes most especially red slippers, goats and chicken.

Where I grew up, if you don’t eat chicken and chapo on Christmas day then doom on you. Nobody cares whether you’ve been eating chapos for the past two weeks straight, as long as on Chrissy your house is not emitting chapo smell, you shall be the topic of discussion and an example of poor management skills and lack of finances. Wearing new clothes is also another entity where certain women have perfected their eyes and tongues. This is the time you realize that people have actually been keen on what you’ve been wearing the entire year, including your shoes. Doom on you once again if you even dare throw a ‘seen’ scarf over your dress. Thou shall be new. If not, then doom on you. Some of them have the courage to ask you point blank if you did not have time to pass by muthurwa to grab a few “essentials”. “Na ndio zilikuwa cheap kwanza stock ya jana”.

In January, the aftermath of the ghost is actually felt. Banks are filled with loan applicants, self-help groups commonly known as chamas are drifting due to interior wars: all the women want an advance. The money is needed critically: school fees, food, rent, electricity and water bills are all looking at you, lugubriously in fact. True desperation is engulfing the country. So better be wise, you either embrace the ghost or ignore it. It is fully your choice.